- Alcohol
Told by Wendy Lee Nentwig
A grateful recovered alcoholic and addict, Tondra has been sober since Sept. 7, 1996. Getting clean wasn’t initially her idea. It all started when she received a nudge from the judge. After winding up in court, a judge graciously offered treatment in lieu of conviction, and Tondra agreed to get help for her problem with crack cocaine. Even as she entered treatment, though, she still didn’t see the pills, marijuana or alcohol she was abusing as a problem. Fortunately, she found a great sponsor who encouraged her to put all the effort she used in pursuing drugs toward staying sober instead.
The real question became, “What are you willing to do to stay sober?”
Her addiction problems began early. Growing up, Tondra felt caught between two different worlds. Her parents divorced when she was nine, and her mom worked while her dad went to bars. During her weekend visits, Tondra tagged along with dad, shooting pool. By junior high, she was hanging out with a crowd that was drinking. Her dad was an alcoholic, a trait he inherited from his mom and passed on to his own daughter. While Tondra’s brother can take one sip of beer and put it down, it doesn’t work that way for her. From there, her substance abuse problems grew until that day in court that changed her life.
Looking back on that time, Tondra can see that what she was doing wasn’t working, and yet she hadn’t accepted that concept of surrender. She couldn’t understand that someone else could know what is best for her life because she was unwilling to let go of the steering wheel. Today, she urges others in her situation to just try sitting in the passenger seat. “Just try it,” she urges, adding, “I would never have thought that I would be here.”
“Here” is Tondra’s own intervention service, established in 2007. It’s a role she says she was called to and one she relishes. She reaches out to help others get out of what she calls “that hole in the sidewalk” of addiction. Particularly close to her heart are the adolescent interventions she does because her own substance abuse started when she was just 14.
No matter how far she’s come, though, this mom and wife of two grown sons will never forget where she’s been. “I’m still in awe of that day in December,” she says. “I resigned from being the CEO of my life in 1996.” Now, she’s buckled into that passenger seat and she’s enjoying the ride.